IF YOU CAN’T DAZZLE THEM WITH BRILLIANCE… BAFFLE THEM WITH BULLS#@$!!!

Whenever you listen to Republican spokesmen present the espoused political philosophies and ideologies of the Republican party, they always seem so reasonable. After all, they’re competing in the “Marketplace of Ideas.” Among reasonable people, the strength of one’s ideas should prevail and win the day. For example, if I’m dragging a heavy sled up a hill and you come along and show me the “Wheel,” you and I are not going to have an argument. The only thing I want to know is where can I get a set of four?

If I’m breaking a sweat, trying to make a fire rubbing two sticks together and you show up with a BIC lighter, I’m going to want to borrow it or buy it. You’ve got a better idea and I’m all in! When Republicans talk about a smaller government, it sounds reasonable… on the surface. You’ve got my attention. Tell me more! You lay out how if government were smaller, I could keep more of the hard earned money I make. Sounding good! Here comes the sticky part. In order to make government smaller, we have to cut back somewhere. Okay, I understand that. We cannot make government smaller without cutting something. That’s perfectly logical. What do you propose we cut?

You give me your list and suddenly I turn ashen white… no easy feat for a person of color! On your list I find the following:

• Education.
• What you call “Entitlement Programs.” (Odd choice of words – more later)
• EPA. – Environmental Protection Administration.
• FDA.
• Banking restrictions.
• Corporate tax rates.
• Infrastructure maintenance.
• Federal salaries – not congressmen, but other government workers.
• Collective bargaining – Unions.

As I catch my breath from the staggering implications of your plan, I point out that you left “military spending” off your list. Being that the United States spends more on it’s military than the next 6 closest nations… COMBINED! Why no cutbacks there? You respond that we need a strong military to keep us safe. Okay, but safe from what? Safe from whom? Technology has come along way since WWII. Even marginal nations can so blanket a battlefield with bombs and munitions, it would be suicidal to have tank battalions amassed for a shootout. Certainly any nations who presumably could pose a threat, all have nuclear capabilities. It doesn’t take 1,000 nukes to send us all back to the stone age.

Let’s explore the whole entitlement program thing. What exactly do you mean by entitlements? Social Security? Medicare? Welfare? Veteran’s benefits? I’m really not feeling you on this one. I started working when I was 14. I was stunned when my first paycheck did not reflect the money from all the hours I’d worked. My father sat me down and explained the facts of life. I learned that FICA – who the hell is he??? – was money the Government took out of my check for Social Security and Medicare and other programs that I didn’t need at 14, but I would need when I got older. How much older I asked? At that time it was 62. Hell! That was an eternity away! I’ll be 55 in a couple of months, and suddenly the prospect of receiving all that money the Government borrowed from me for a lifetime of work, seems within reach. What do you mean by dismissing it as an “Entitlement Program?” Entitled to it? No! It’s mine. I own it! I paid for it!

You know? Come to think of it, I’m rather fond of breathing clean air and drinking clean water. While we’re on this subject I find comfort in knowing – believing – that someone is monitoring our food supply and making sure the drugs my doctor prescribes have been checked and tested. Don’t get me started on the banks! Those bastards on the executive boards of banks all need to be rounded up and put in prison for grand larceny! I suppose you’ve never ran a tight balance in your checking account and had the bank take their fee first and bounce 3 checks! NSF fees of $30.00 each for a $6 dollar miscalculation. How about this one. Ever had a Credit Card with the payment scheduled on the first of the month? Ever have the bank change the payment date to the 15th without telling you? Then hit you with a late fee? Report to the credit reporting agencies that you were late? We need more banking restrictions!

Education? We’ve got far too many dummies running around now! Most of them claiming to be Republicans. The stupidity level in this country has been on the rise as the money we spend on education decreases. We need more teachers. They need to be paid more. Schools need to be better equipped. At this point my Republican friend walks off in a huff! However, this is not the end! This is the most critical thing to watch.

I’ve been paying attention. Republicans have been busy redrawing districts to their political advantage. They’ve been funding groups – True The Vote – who’s masthead says they’re a non-profit organization. The reality is they’re a *for profit* business! What is their business? There sole purpose for existence is to block perceived democrats from voting by any means necessary. Republican controlled States have been busily putting in place new voter restrictions – a poll tax – that now causes citizens to have to pay for new types of ID just to vote.

The problem is clear! Republican ideas are NOT winning in the marketplace of ideas, so they’re trying to rig the market! This past week has been one disaster after the other for Mitt Romney. First he steps in it big time over the embassy attacks. Before he can breach the surface for air, a tape is released where he’s talking to some donors who paid $50,000 a plate. I’m sure he felt comfortable. He admits that he doesn’t really give a damn about 47% of our fellow citizens. To him and those present, the 47% are the unwashed masses who are living off the government and costing taxpayers. The irony is, if you’ve got $50,000 to blow on a dinner with poor entertainment? Featuring the world’s worst stand up comedian? You’ve probably got an armada of accountants and you’re not paying any taxes.

During Mitt’s stand up bit, the subject of the Latino vote came up. Mitt jokes that his father was born in Mexico and that if he had been born a Latino he might do better with the Latino vote and have an easier time running for office! NOT FUNNY! Not funny at all! Now Mitt is on his “apology tour.” He made an appearance on the Spanish speaking network “Univision.” His problem? He appeared in “BROWN FACE!” Really Mitt??? Do you think the Hispanic community is that stupid? How insulting! I’m just thankful you didn’t try  to appear in Black Face at the NAACP Convention!